Something odd is happening over in Shepherd's Bush. Nothing unusual there: odd and Shepherd's Bush are two words that fit snugly in the same sentence, it's that kind of place. But this is something else.

All evening there's been this strange sound of groaning metal, like the noise a sinking ship makes as the seams start to pop and the rivets fly out as it turns turtle; or for anyone who watches sci-fi horror flicks where some mammoth Alien thing is eating Manhattan then it's the unearthly moaning they always generate in superabundance.

Yet Shepherd's Bush is neither a drowning ship nor Manhattan, so what's going on, and why does it seem to be getting progressively closer to where I live?