"Heels that don't hurt". This, by the way, is a strap line in an advert for Gaymers cider, not me pleading to find a pair that don't turn my feet into steak tartare. But it keeps reminding me every time I see it of the numerous stories I've been told by women involving heels, or more properly, shoes. It has the arc of a narrative: the hunt, the quest, the decision, the mental wardrobe matching, then the purchase. And if there's anyone reading who has flipped through Robert Mckee's self-help scriptwriting book "Story", it's got conflict situations and dilemmas: it's the last pair...to buy or not to buy...there's someone else and they're picking them up...!"

There is, I think, more emotional capital invested in a pair of shoes by women than men in general. Broadly, and this is culled from my own experiences, a man gets a new pair of shoes usually because the only pair he's got are riddled with more holes than in a termite mound, and there's no way he can wander into the office wearing shirt, tie and football boots. It's necessity, therefore the purchasing act is utilitarian - I need, I buy; it's as functional as that. Let me say this: I don't wait until the sole and uppers of my shoes are flapping like dolphin flippers. I do buy as and when, and have probably got a larger footwear collection than the average male*

On the other side of the house, there's much more going on, something intimate, about identity, role-playing. Different shoes, different mood, but much more subtly based than for a man. I've spent long-time in shoe shops watching girlfriends appraise a pair of shoes, trying them on is just a part of it, maybe even a smaller part than might be imagined.

And from what I've seen I also think there's a emotional attachment which simply is n't for men. Almost as if it's possible to mark out different stages of their personal history. One friend said to me, and only semi-humorously, that she was close to the age where wearing pointy shoes was going to become difficult. I only imagine this is somehow connected to the notion I alluded to earlier about identity, being someone different if only momentarily. I don't have that. I can't pin a mood or event to what I had on my feet.

Nevertheless, I'm not immune to memory / item association. Mine's books. I can tell you exactly where I was and how I felt when I read particular books.

* 16 pairs. The full monty: Brogues, boots, trainers, desert boots.