The reaction I get when I tell some people who I work for, you'd think I worked for Satan.

Mine's a tough company, and hard work, but I don't shlep for Beelezebub. My salary's earned the hard way.

Use some of his tools, though. No, not a pitchfork, and I don't sit on a pentagram shaped chair...I use Excel instead.

I might as well be using a pencil with no lead, a pen with no ink. It's that helpful.

I've spent most of the week pushing the Excel rock all the way up the boulder strewn hill, to within a few inches from the summit; I rest for a moment to steady myself for the final push, just for it to roll all the way back to where I began. Day after day of this. From dawn till dusk.

And it's painful to use; the bloody grid-lines are scorched on to my retinas. My fingers - those poor index fingers - ache and throb. I may need physio on my fingers the way this going. I lose power in these two digits, then I'm done... have to be medically retired.

Has there ever been such a piece of perverse software as this ?

Stubborn, spiteful, contradictory....only someone in league with the Devil has the instinctive malice to devise something as cantankerous as this. No reasonable person with even half an ounce of compassion or empathy could.

God spare me from Excel.