I like chocolate and it likes me. We were made for each other. We talk. All day, every day. All that temptress has to do is lie back on the newspaper shop shelves, give me that beseeching look, and start to whisper: "Buy me, go on you know you want to. You've had a tough day".

Whether it's good day or a bad day, we flirt: they implore, flashing and pouting their wrappers at me; I demur, play hard to get. Nevertheless, it's an age old story with the inevitable conclusion. I give in. Always. They win.

But, it's always a casual relationship. Never lasts that long. I buy it. I unwrap it. I eat it. And If I can do that after I've left the shop, then it's considered long term. We never make it home together.

The only commited relationship I've had to date is with organic chocolate. I think it's the price.